Difficult people are seemingly everywhere in this broken world. It scares me when someone is able to look me right in the eye and lie right to my face.

 I usually know they’re lying, but what really concerns me is they seem to be lying to themselves as well and they believe their own dishonesty.   I wonder if they would even care if they actually did think about their willingness to just throw their character out the car window like roadside trash waiting for inmates to pick up during a work gang.  I’m doubting they would ever progress to that reality of truth while acting out on such a low-level. If it did come up, it would be a faint flicker (of hope, but seen as pain) and snuffed out before it even hit their conscious mind.  In other words, it wouldn’t have a chance.

There have been many times (and still are) when I’ve felt a desire for revenge against these Pinocchio types.  They empower themselves by ranting and raving about their garbage and get offended when I don’t buy it.  People rant because they’re trying to sell themselves their own lies.  The rant is part of the duel.  They’re lying and their soul is screaming about it so they have to “scream” louder…thus the rant.  A rant is a kind of trance.  The ranter not only doesn’t listen, they can’t.  They will continually repeat their lies like a mantra trying to beat the soul into buying it.  The soul, mature and unwilling to be pushy, will back off.  Thus the inner duel begins.  The victim (more likely a willing participate) who is being assaulted by the rant is just a co-signer of the lies whether they realize it or not.  If they argue, the rant will become louder and scarier.  If they don’t, their mere presence tells the liar it’s not about them.  I doubt there are many people who rant alone.

Besides insulting my intelligence, these types leave me exhausted.  At least it’s fair in that regard, it leaves them exhausted too, but worse because there’s little bounce-back.  Lying is costly. Self-deception is one of the main reasons most people can’t sit still. Truth rises to the top during stillness and unknowingly to them, these people use everything from alcohol to cell phones to keep that from happening.  Devils unaware.  When people participate in dishonesty, it unsettles their soul.  When they try to make themselves believe it, their soul tries to do a prison break.  Sick or not and depending on how nasty someone has been to me, I find comfort knowing that they are going to pay that bill one way or another by over-eating, over-spending, etc.  And compared to some dire illness, those forms of payment are cheap.  The depth and volume of this type of deception chooses the form of payment it wants; the liar has no say in it.  When the soul and the ego part of the mind have a duel, the soul always wins.  It will get its way – even if it’s 50 years down the line.  They can’t even have a draw because their fighting has different targets.  The mind in its ego form is worldly so it’s fighting for something meaningless while the soul is fighting to protect itself and the spirit.  The soul does get worldly, but it’s rare and usually it’s a rescue effort.  One time, many years ago, I was working myself to death (literally) in a restaurant while trying to help (enable) someone.  I was doing more for them than they were doing for themselves and I should have been the co-dependency poster child. One night after a shift, I just left and never went back.    Of course I did my side-work first…one of my best co-dependent moves ever. LOL.

Liars and all negative aspects of humans pollute and spread bad “germs” which literally affects the law of vibration.  Our world is so broken it’s become the norm and the soul-searchers are outnumbered.  My estimate is 100,000:1.  When you get down in life, put that as number one on your gratitude list. You’ve already won.  You get to spend the rest of your life polishing the most important thing you’ll ever have and you do this by sharing it and giving it away.  Spiritual things are like that.  The gigantic numbers of broken people are so amuck that they are more often the types of teachers that teach us what NOT to do.  Finding a real mentor is key and it’s a task.  Most of my personal puzzle profile building comes from meditation.  Without it, I’d be one of those what not to do teachers too.  Wow.  I am so grateful to wake up and be me. I’d give away everything I have borrowed (usually stated as owned) to keep the clue I have.  Everything…well, almost everything.  My fluffy kitty stays with me – hell or high water!  LOL.

The broken liars I’ve dealt with lately have reminded me of some things I need to work on.  During conversations with people, I have gotten better at listening and not giving unsolicited advice, but there’s still that deep, sick, belief that I have a responsibility to fix certain people.  And this one, seemingly small belief tears down all of the work I’ve done on myself, removes me from being in the present, and causes me to eat icing for dinner.  And this fallback is always paid in full at receipt (more like acceptance) of “services”.  In other words, that cake doesn’t have a chance.  Stopping that train before it crashes can be done, but it’s costly and the core price is exhaustion and mental torment.  It’s also very arrogant because it reeks the idea that I actually have the ability to change someone.  I can’t even change myself.  Every baby step of progress I’ve made has been a gift from God.  It frightens me that by participating in one sick behavior can throw my little world axis off and spin me into space like one of those lost NASA thingys just flying around out there doing nothing except being a point of interest at times when one of those stellar type magazines doesn’t have anything new to publish.

When this ego vs. soul duel idea hit me, I was eating Chinese food with some friends.  When it was fortune cookie time, I received a little gift.  Mine said, “You identified the issue. Bring the attention to it”. Oh how I cherish those small communications when I notice them. And that’s one of the biggest prices I pay when I’m off my axis – I miss most of the Godly messages gifted to me.  God communicates with us 24/7 and it is impossible to see (hear, smell, touch, taste, think, dream, have a premonition, etc., ad infinitum) while spinning out of control.   It takes almost all I have to stay in the present (and this is a gift).  It is audacious for me to even “go there” in regards to thinking I could change another person.  Fortunately, we have a loving God and when we miss the little messages, he will send them again unless they’re outdated due to environmental changes.

I started looking at people (including myself) differently quite a while ago.  A lot of people wear their spiritual duel and sometimes it’s easy to see – overweight, under the influence, angry, worldly, etc. These types are easy.  What has amazed me is there are masses of people who belong in Hollywood.  At the very least they should join SAG.  They have perfected their “normal mask”.  But when they’re home or God forbid, alone, the monster will surface with teeth bared and claws out. They’re the deacon at the church who goes home and abuses his wife; the PTA mother who  always volunteers for everything  then goes home and hits her kids for not being perfect and making her look good.  Our society cannot get that you cannot save your face and your ass at the same time – it is not possible.  But for now, I will continue to enjoy watching people try.  Sometimes I enjoy being a little sick…